My Journey Not to Settle...anymore!: Happiness

My favorite quote (or reminder as I like to think of them)...

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same.” (Marianne Williamson - A Return to Love)

Thursday, January 13, 2011

Happiness

I've been having this overwhelming sense of happiness INSIDE of my body lately. It's weird, but I absolutely know what it is. And it's surging out of my skin -- like truly. I FEEL it pulsing through my being. And for no particular reason in the world.

In fact, it seems that I should be feeling quite the opposite -- after all, it's the dead middle of this f'ing thing we call Winter in Wisconsin (which I hate more than any, ANY, thing in the whole wide world), my best friend's father was just told he will be lucky to make it to Christmas (which goes along w/ the fact that her sister-in-law was given the SAME "news") and there are no words to describe her sadness...my sister in law (& friend) :o) just got some yucky health news about her sister which piles on to her struggles she is having w/ my God-daughter (her youngest daughter) and her husband's "health" issues...my arm is still killing me....and then there's the fact that it's hard to keep my brain in the game right now because we are so slow in our little town of Genesee Depot...AND the added burden of never having enough time (or days off) anymore, I should REALLY be feeling quite the opposite.

But I'm not. My body is a surge of moving goooo and my energy levels are extremely high. Maybe it's cuz I'm back on coffee. Nah...I only have 1-2 cups a day, so c'mon, really? Maybe this is that "coming into your own" thing that folks always say happens in your 40's?? I dunno.

I do know this, I'm not pregnant, I don't do drugs (never have), and it doesn't matter. Maybe it's simply the fact that even though Jeanne and Lisa and others know that I love them and love them and love them and maybe having delivered that communication is enough to create a moment of peace inside of me.

Or it's the coffee.